Recipe: Cinnamon Loaf Cake

One day I came across a recipe for a cinnamon loaf cake and I thought it was genius! I've always loved cinnamon rolls, but never attempted to make them as I thought (and still think) it's complex to make and knead dough (I'm not patient enough to try this yet, but maybe someday!) It was really exciting to know that I could make something close enough, so I gave it a try and I'm extremely happy with how it turned out! This recipe is so simple and easy to put together, and it will leave your home smelling yumm!

Here's how:

1. Bowl on the left (let's call it the Brown mixture) contains:

• Half a cup of softened butter
• Half a cup of brown sugar
• One spoon of cinnamon powder
• One spoon of flour
• A pinch of salt
• Mix all together with a spoon and set aside

2. Bowl on the right (the batter) contains:

• One and a half cup of sieved flour
• Half a cup of white sugar
• Two teaspoons of baking powder
• Mix with a hand whisk then add:
• A quarter cup of oil 
• Three quarter cup of milk 
• One beaten egg
• Mix with a hand whisk until you get a runny batter

3. Pour half of the batter into a loaf tin

 4. Use a spoon and get scoops of the brown mixture and add it on top

 5. With a chopstick or toothpick, loosen the lumps of brown mixture by making swirls, so that it spreads around thinly

 6. Pour in the rest of the batter and repeat

7. Put the cake into the oven pre-heated at 175°C. Bake for an hour

8. Just before the hour is up, you can start to prepare the frosting (optional). The one I made contains: 

• 110g softened butter
• 60g cream cheese
• 2 spoons of milk 
• 1 cup of powdered sugar
• Mix with a spoon until smooth, then spread half of this on top of the cake while it's still warm. Keep the other half of the frosting for the future (sometimes you might want to add a little extra to your slice)

9. After about an hour, I took the cake out of the pan. The frosting hadn't yet completely set. I had a little slice of the warm cake, and kept the rest in the fridge. 

It was so heavenly having it warm! It smelt so good, the cake was soft and the runny frosting was just divine!!

10. After about an hour in the fridge (by then the frosting had hardened a bit), I brought it out to have another slice.

 I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT! The cake wasn't too sweet, which is exactly how I love my cakes. It was moist and the brown mixture had just the right amount of sweetness and flavour. I really loved the cream cheese in the frosting. I felt happy to be able to make something that I often enjoy eating out (it's very empowering when you figure out how to make in your own kitchen something that you only used to get once in a while outside). These new skills definitely come in handy these days, given that our movements are still restricted (because of the pandemic).

The cake tasted like one of my most favourite sweets - namoura (a Lebanese semolina cake soaked in sugar syrup - probably the sweetest thing I can manage). The cinnamon loaf wasn't as sweet as namoura of course, but I guess the moisture inside it, and the denseness gave that namoura feel.  For the third time, the creamcheese frosting is absolutely AMAZING!

Recipe: Lemon Loaf Cake

If there's one thing I must always have in the kitchen - it's got to be lemon! I LOVE most sour things - especially in desserts (eg. candies, sorbets, cakes with berries). Certain meals I have are always drenched in lemon juice (corned beef, baked salmon, adobo, stir fry...) When Nuri and I were planning our wedding, the plan was to only serve desserts (pastries and baked goodies with tea and coffee at 4pm). We reached out to our friends on the guest list to bake something, but there was one particular item that I insisted on having, and wanted it so bad. Lemon bars! None of my friends could make it, but one friend said he makes great lemon cheesecake and I was so excited for that! Believe me, I was looking forward to it so much that I let Nuri decide completely on the wedding cake (he wanted a super-duper-chocolatey-chocolate cake, which I wasn't crazy about but I didn't mind, as long as I could have something lemon-y to devour!) I didn't get to have that lemon cheesecake because the party didn't happen, but when we went on lockdown and I decided to give baking a try, the very first recipe I looked for and tried was a lemon cake! I first made it two months ago and I absolutely loved it, and yesterday (my second time making it), I decided to take photos photos so that I could share the recipe with you! 

1. You'll need the following ingredients in one mixing bowl:

• 1/2 cup (113g) softened butter (Since I don't have a microwave, I simply just took the butter out of the fridge and left it on the table for about two hours to soften)
• 1 cup of sugar
• Whisk together for around 10 minutes, until fluffy

•  Pour in 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
• The zest of 3 large lemons
• Whisk away 

• Three eggs. Add them in one by one (pour one, then whisk, then add another one and whisk...) 

2. Set that mixture aside, then get another bowl and add:

• 1.5 cup of flour
• 2 teaspoons of baking powder
• Half a teaspon of salt 
• Mix all together with a spoon 

3. Then pour in half of the flour mixture into the other bowl (with the liquid mixture). 

• Fold in the flour with a spatula

• Add half a cup of Greek yoghurt

• And 2 spoons of lemon juice 

 3. Whisk, then add in the other half of the flour, fold in and whisk until everything is mixed well.

4. Pour into a loaf tin, and bake for one hour at 160°C

5. Just before the hour is up, you can start preparing the lemon syrup:

• 1/4 cup of sugar
• 2 spoons of lemon juice
• melt over low fire

6. Take out the lemon cake loaf, and while it is still hot, poke some holes at the top. You can use a toothpick, or a fork.

7. After you've made the little holes, pour in the lemon syrup and watch it sink into the cake!! Don't worry about the messy holes, because you can cover it up with lemon frosting!

8.  When the cake has cooled (in around 2-3 hours), you can start preparing the lemon frosting:

• 1 cup of powdered sugar
• 3-4 spoons of lemon juice
• Mix in a bowl until it becomes smooth 
• Take the cake out of the pan, and unto a plate and pour the frosting over the top!

9. Optional - decorate the top of the cake with some lemon zest, or candy spinkles

 10. Be patient! Wait another hour for the frosting to set then it's ready to be enjoyed!

Perfect for the summer with some cold coffee!

Recipe: Mac-less Mac & Cheese!

Before I discovered the bread-less keto burgers I made the other week (using cabbage as a bun), my favourite keto food was the keto mac & cheese Nuri has been making it for us for many months now! It's very simple and I always enjoy it. You basically chop some cauliflower into small pieces, boil it, and drain it. That's your macaroni. While that's happening, we'd normally put some bacon in the oven and cook until it's a little crispy, then we take it out and chop into small bits. Then we toss the bacon into the pot of cauliflower, and pour a small pack of mozzarella cheese and mix everything together. If you cover the pot, the cheese just melts into the mixture and everything becomes creamy. It's absolutely yummy!

Today, we made the mac and cheese, but a little fancier (we went just a little extra on the meat). Here's the recipe in photos:

1. First, I prepared the meat. I sauted some onions with garlic and black pepper, then added some chicken breast strips. When it was slightly brown, I added some chopped bacon. I fried it all together until crispy to my liking. I added some hot paprika, and in the last 5 minutes I added some chopped mushrooms. You can be creative with this; sometimes add hotdog to the bacon. You can add bell peppers if you like.

2. While the meat was frying, we chopped half a cauliflower (including the stem and leaves). Wash, then put in a large bowl and pourboiling water into the pot (just enough to submerge the cauliflower). This part doesn't take long because the water is already hot. You could boil the cauliflower for maybe just 10 minutes. When it's done, take the water out/drain it. 

3. Mix the meat with the cauliflower.

4. Add in the cheese! We normally just go with mozzarella. Today we added a little bit of cream cheese as well. You do this while the fire is off. The cheese will quickly melt with the steam of the hot food. Mix and mix and that's it!

5. Here's my plate, topped with some parmesan cheese.

Often, there's sauce at the bottom of the pot (remaining water from the cauliflower) which mixes with the cheese, and has the flavours of the meat. It's a very heart-warming dish which we enjoy together every single time. Mac and cheese without the carbs! 

Post-keto reflections

I stopped the keto diet after 21 days. I could have gone longer, honestly, but one evening I just... did...not...feel like doing it anymore. It was a strange feeling; if you look at my first two weeks keto diary, I was genuinely loving it! I could say I was tired of the restrictions, but we had a lot of fun experimenting with carb-substitutes. I felt healthy and energetic, but preparing (and even thinking of what to prepare) was a bit of work. Anyways, at least I got one thing I really wanted to gain out of the experience - a love for salad. The night I ended the diet, I had a few pieces of mini-stroopwafels to go with my tea, and that was it.

How did I feel over the next few days?

1. The very next morning, and every morning after that, I woke up with a grumbling stomach. I was hungry! During keto, that never happened; I'd be able to not eat anything at all until after 1pm. I guess that's the truth about sugar/carbs - they keep you full only for a short period of time.

2. I felt a little bad; I felt like I failed especially because I said I'd go for a month, and gave up one week before the end. Nuri kept reminding me that keto is not meant for everyone. I cheered myself up by reminding myself that I didn't give it up because I couldn't resist carbs. In fact, I thought that the carbs I'd miss the most would be pasta and potatoes, but it turned out to be bread! One of the first things I had after the keto was a plain baguette! I didn't attack the chocolates (oh because I've learnt to appreciate 80%+ dark chocolate!).  So it wasn't that something tempted me out of it. 


When it comes to food, I'm not addicted to anything. There's only a certain amount of sweets I can have per day before my head hurts, and as much as I love pasta I cannot eat it everyday.  Could I say keto made me feel like I had to be addicted to healthy, and I just didn't like that feeling of being addicted to something? Perhaps a little part of me just didn't like the box. I've never tried being a vegetarian or vegan, and I've never tried to remove something completely out of my diet before, so this was very new. Although I got used to it, I guess knowing that I can eat healthy made me feel that it was okay to go back to normal, trusting that I would continue to make healthy choices every now and then.

3. Nuri is still on his keto diet. Like I mentioned in the first week's diary - he has done this many times, so it's very easy for him. It doesn't mean we now eat completely separate meals. I've learned to love salad, so I'm still content joining him in eating only salad on days he opts for that.  Most times we have the same main dish (eg. once we both had baked salmon, another day we had pork stew), and I ate it with jasmine rice, while he made himself his cauliflower rice! It worked!

I remember many months ago when Nuri was on keto, I used to be very stubborn about it. For example one time we went out for a barbecue and I made a really delicious potato salad for the potluck. I insisted that he tried it, even just a spoon, but he refused and remained streadfast, and I might have gotten a little upset! Now that I've tried and understood how the diet works, I've learnt that you can't just have a small spoon or sugar/carbs in the middle of the diet because it will affect the ketosis. So these days I no longer insist; I understand his diet a lot better now! Going on keto is a commitment, and I've gained a lot of respect for it now and Nuri's healthy choices of eating.

4. Just because I'm off keto, it doesn't mean I only opt for carbs. While on keto, I learnt a great deal about nutrients.  Checking the nutritional facts on food packages is indeed something new that I've learnt, and I'm very grateful for that.

Recipe: Keto Flaxseed Bread

After our failed attempt at making keto cloud bread a few days ago, Nuri and I decided to try another bread recipe today. This one is made with flaxseed. I've never had flaxseed before this, so when we bought a pack today, I learned about how healthy it is - rich with Omega3 fatty acids, antioxidants and fibre. I still don't know enough about the ways it can be consumed, but here's something we baked in the kitchen: 

1. For a loaf of bread with 8-10 slices, you need 2.5 cups of grounded flaxseed (blend until it's fine and smooth).

2. In a large bowl, add one teaspoon of baking powder, one teaspoon of baking powder, and mix with the flaxseed. Then pour in one cup of cold water, and one teaspoon of apple cide vinegar. Mix some more.

3. That's it! Bring out your baking tin and mould your dough into a loaf shape. It doesn't become as hard as normal dough (with flour), so you need to be a little gentle. Optional: top the bread with some pumpkin or chia seeds.

4. Bake at 180C for one hour. Yes, a whole hour.

 5. Once the bread has cooled down, you can slice it up and enjoy!

The color settings of my phone camera isn't great - it makes the bread look very grey and dry, but it was far from it! It was brown and alive, almost like a loaf of brown wheat bread! The insides were soft and smelt nice. Naturally, the bread tasted seedy (the main ingredient was flaxseed!) The next day, we toasted a slice each (placed it on a pan with a little butter) then after the sides crispened up a bit, I had a bite with some peanutbutter spread and it was yummy! So I'd suggest you enjoy this bread with a spread of your choice, rather than consume it plain.

Keto Diary: Week 2

Day 8: May 17
Last night, Nuri read my week 1 keto diary and he was very happy and excited with my progress and the fact that I'm liking this diet! This afternoon we did some grocery shopping and I was impressed with how the heaviest bag was filled with cauliflower, tomatoes, lettuce, cucumbers, whereas before our bags would be bulky because of chips and yoghurt! For lunch, as usual, I made myself some salad. I also found a few pieces of mushrooms in the fridge, and I didn't want it to go bad, so I stuffed them some of last night's salsa a la Nuri and cheese and placed them on a pan, covered it and cooked it on low fire. I was craving some kind of meat this afternoon, but couldn't decide what to bring out of the freezer, so I decided to try some canned tuna in oil with my salad:

My lunch at 2pm: stuffed mushrooms with salad and tuna

I also had a small bowl of chia seed pudding right after my meal. I sent Nuri a photo of my lunch and he now wants to start a food diary too! I was very happy with this meal - I poured lots of lemon on the tuna bits, and the mushrooms were juicy and delicious.

We had an early dinner last night because we had an online class to attend to at 7pm, so I thought of something quick to prepare. All this took only 30 minutes to prepare and cook! I made Nuri's favourite food in the whole world - we learnt it from one of my Ugandan friends here. You saute some onions, toss in some tomatoes until a little juicy, then in the last 5 minutes drop some sliced kale and cover so it can steam cook. Nuri loves kale, so he was excited when he learnt this dish, and we began to call it the "Alex dish". But because Nuri would make it every single week (no kidding), sometimes with his twists, I told him we might as well change it to Nuri's dish. Anyways, we've been calling it the "kale dish" these days. I made that for dinner, but right before adding the tomatoes, I added some shrimps. Oh and on top of the tomatoes, I added about a spoonfull of last night's salsa a la Nuri, for some extra taste.  While that was happening, I made some cauliflower rice. In case I didn't describe the process last week - you saute some onions, add garlic if you like, and black pepper then add the cauliflower. Don't cook too long - 5 minutes should be enough or else the cauliflower will get mushy. And there you go - another quick and filling meal FULL of nutritious vegetables!

Dinner at 6pm 

Day 9: May 18
Remember last week when I said I'll let you know when a certain miracle happens? Well, it happened today! I was up and out of bed very early in the morning for a walk! Nuri has been regular with his morning runs and workout. Today, we found ourselves awake at 5am, and he thought the weather was nice, so I decided to give it a try. We just walked - up and downhill, then I came home and he did his run. I'm blogging this at 6:30 because I'm wide awake and full of energy!

I've been thinking about what this week's keto diary is looking like so far. Yesterday, I just shared what I ate. Last week I had a lot of reflections and that's because it was new, I was learning a lot and wanted to share. But now that I have a hang of it, I don't know what more I have to say! But maybe  I'll use this little space to clear out one misunderstanding I had. Last week, we learnt about keto snacks. But then I realized that between lunch and dinner, I never felt hungry! There was never a moment I craved something to eat. And that's because the high-fat food in our keto diet keeps us feeling full much longer. So Nuri recommended eating the fatbombs, for example, with the meal -  right after lunch/dinner like a dessert and that's what we've been doing. Each time we snack, our insulin level spikes - even the more so when we snack on carbs/sugar. So this has been one of the many plus sides to keto, especially since I'm just home all day - previously there was often the tendency to munch on chips or have cookies or a slice of cake with my afternoon tea but gone are those days! And with no effort at all! I didn't have to control/resist the urge - this keto diet simply just took those habits away.

Lunch at 1:30pm: scrambled eggs, hotdogs and tomatoes

At around 1pm, I felt I wasn't hungry and thought I'd skip lunch and just have an early dinner but then I realized I needed to eat so I could take my medicine. The quickest thing I could pull together was three hotdogs, two eggs (scrambled with cheese, mayonnaise, black and red pepper), and one tomato. I'll make up for the salad/nutrients this dinner - I'm planning to make something exciting!








At 5:30pm I started preparing some rice-less sushi! I learnt that you can make cauliflour mushy and substitute for sushi rice, but because we had cauliflower rice two days in a row, I decided to leave it out of the rolls. This is pretty much salad rolled in seaweed paper. I learnt that seaweed paper is very nutritious - it's rich in calcium (10x more calcium than milk!), copper, iron, magnesium, manganese, phosphorus, potassium, selenium, zinc, and vitamins A, B, C, D, E and K, among others. And ten sheets of seaweed paper is only 9 calories! This is amazing! I made ten rolls for us, and cut them in half and we dipped them in soysauce but while eating, I realized I should have sliced them smaller (typical sushi-bite size) because it was a little difficult to tear through the paper.

Dinner: rice-less sushi!

In case you're interested in the recipe, here's what I did: on each sheet, I first put a piece of lettuce, and spread cream cheese on it, then placed a thin slice of smoked salmon. Then I added a slice of cucumber, carrot, bell pepper and some avocadoes. With each roll, I press it inwards to keep it firm, and at the end, I dapped water lightly on the edge of the roll - this helps it stick.

Maybe an hour after dinner, we went out for a little walk - this was my first time taking an evening walk (well in the last two months, at least). This was refreshing, and helped digest this fun, filling and healthy salad!

Day 10: May 19
Similar to yesterday, I really didn't want to eat lunch but because of the medicine, I had to consume something. I sliced some lettuce and had some balsamic pork and carrots which we did not prepare.

Lunch: balsamic pork and carrots, and some lettuce

Dinner was fun! I made some zucchini pasta, pretty much like last Sunday but this time with meatballs. In case you're interested, here's the recipe:

1. The meatballs were ground beef, mixed with some salt, pepper, thyme and some grounded almonds. Mushed all together then rolled into little balls. I didn't oil the baking sheet; instead; I placed a few bacon pieces around the pan and it cooked in the natural oil of the bacon! They came out very soft and juicy!

2. Pasta - we spiralized six zucchinis. You need to cut them short before cooking, because they don't break as easily as pasta. We cooked it in the tomato sauce for maybe 20 minutes - until the zucchini softened a bit. So, the zucchini doesn't taste like your typical spaghetti. It doesn't become as soft. It's a little bit crunchy - I'm not sure if it will become softer if I boil it longer. That's something you can try!

3. Tomato sauce - I sauted some onion, with garlic, black pepper, turmeric powder, some jalapenos and mashed tomatoes. Very simple.

4. The zucchini pasta cooked in the sauce, and when the meatballs were cooked, I mixed them into the pasta/sauce so that it could soak in some of those juices.

5. Topped with parmessan cheese:

Day 11: May 20
Today's the last day to take meds! Nuri stayed home today - he prepared the salad, and then we also had some kuku sabzi (Persian omelet made with a lot of green, and topped with some walnuts) which, again, we did not prepare (it was just heaven-sent!).

And for dinner, I heated up some zucchini pasta leftovers from yesterday. I noticed that the zucchini was softer than yesterday - I think it's because it had more time to rest in the sauce. Left-overs in general always taste better because everything had time to soak in the flavours!

I've been thinking about how long this will go for - my keto diet, I mean. To be honest, I'm very comfortable and used to this already. It's been such a joy learning new keto recipes and trying them out with Nuri. These days because he's back in the office, I've been the one preparing dinner, and we laughed at how the tables have turned! He used to be the one sharing recipes and cooking up dinner, but now I'm the one surprising him with new dishes and taking the initiative to learn more. I really feel a difference - my energy is always up these days. Before, when I'd have a rice or pasta meal for lunch, I'd sometimes feel tired or sleepy afterwards...and I'd often crave maybe a sweet coffee later in the afternoon. Now, with salad or just protein for lunch, I no longer feel sloppy/lazy; I just feel really good inside - my digestive system feels healthy! I no longer feel guilty about anything I eat.

Day 12: May 21
Since I'm done with my meds, I didn't have to eat breakfast or lunch, so I decided to go without eating for as long as I could, and see if I can get a hang of the intermittent fasting part of the keto diet.

Lunch at 2:30pm keto burger

I've got to say this - of ALL the keto meals I've prepared/had in the last two weeks, and months prior, THIS IS MY FAVOURITE! I made a beef patty (similar mixture to the meatballs the other night), and grilled it. Then I got some cabbage - I spread cream cheese on the insides of the lettuce, then my burger was cabbage, beef, hummus, tomatoes, cheese, topped with another cabbage. It was so good!!! Generally I'm not a fan of burgers and it's usually because the bun is very thick, so I prefer smaller/slimmer burgers, so having cabbage to substitute the buns was perfect for me! Of course I couldn't hold this burger in my hands because the cabbage was slippery so I ended up slicing my bites with a knife but that was fine! It's pretty much like a salad but with a beef patty. The meat was juicy, the hummus was a refreshing extra; the whole meal felt light. I don't know if this happens to a lot of people, but I'm the kind of person who often wants a soda after I eat things like burgers and pizza - I guess it's because of the stuffy feeling afterwards, but this one didn't make me crave that. I look forward to experimenting with other greens to serve as the buns, or maybe next time we succeed at making keto cloud breads!

Nuri made dinner - he made cauliflower rice, and a chicken dish (shredded chicken breasts cooked with onions, garlic, some kale and tomatoes) and we poured a little soysauce over our plates before eating:

Day 13: May 22

Fridays is half-day work. When Nuri returned home at 12:30pm, after our hellos, the first thing he said was "I'm going to make ice cream". Keto ice cream?! I got very excited. Here's how he made it: first he whipped up around 600ml of whipping cream. Then he blended 3 avocadoes with half a cup of coconut oil. Then in the end, he mixed the avocado into the whipped cream with a baking spatula. We poured it into a tub, kept it in the freezer and we went out for a 3-and-a-half hour walk! This was our first real walk in over two months! The sun was out, but it was also breezy - it felt very good! We walked down to a beach, we just sat on a bench breathing in the fresh, sea air, soaking in some vitamin D, watching some people kite surfing. Going and coming - we walked a total of 8kilometers. When we returned home, unfotunately our icecream wasn't completely ready because we had to give it a turn so that everything freezes completely. Luckily, two days ago I filled some icecube molds with coffee, so I blended those and we had ourselves a very refreshing coffee shake!

Avocado ice cream topped with cinnamon powder

 Later, we tried the ice cream and I LOVED IT! The blend was light. It's SO amazing, how you can enjoy your favourite treats but in a healthy way - sugarless ice cream! We have stevia (this is a sugar substitute derived from plants, and is keto friendly, but neither of us like the taste, so we didn't use it but you can!) Of course, it's not your typical ice cream because it's sugarless, but the cream and avocadoes naturally taste really good. On our way back home, we stopped by a shop and found a 90% cocoa dark chocolate bar. We bought it (I mentioned last week, chocolate over 85% is keto approved), and we just loved it! I was very surprised with myself because I've never really liked dark chocolate, but I thought to give this a try and I was surprised that I didn't find it bitter like I normally would find dark chocolate. Does it taste better, the higher the cocoa percent? Or have my taste buds adjusted because I haven't had sugar in two weeks? Nuri told me that people who don't like dark chocolate don't actually like chocolate - because dark chocolate is pure/real chocolate (the higher it goes). If you like milk/white chocolate, it's because you like the sugar (those have less of the actual cacao). This made perfect sense! I can officially say I love chocolate!

Dinner at 7pm: shrimp sinigang

Apart from the iced coffee and few scoops of avocado ice cream, the only other thing we both consumed that day was our dinner at 7pm. I made sinigang soup (similiar to last Saturday's soup), but with shrimps. We also made some cauliflower rice to go with this.

Day 14: May 23
I didn't take photos of our meals today - lunch was salad, and dinner was pork and cauliflower rice.

And this wraps up two weeks of the keto diet. For now, I plan to strictly do another two weeks, but I will not blog the next two weeks. Instead, I'll blog recipes every now and then. Maybe at the end of my first month, I'll share some reflections.

Coping with Change during the Corona

It's been exactly two months that I've been working from home. The hardest part was the first three days - March 17 to 19. I still remember what March 17th felt like - I had my computer set up in the living room of my former flat; it was very cold - I couldn't find the remote of the heater and I didn't think of bringing out my blankets. I spent so much time just reading the news trying to understand what was happening and fearfully thinking about what could happen (I would refresh the new button every 15 minutes - no exaggeration). The news was scary - the cases around the world was increasing. I was just counting the hours to the evening of March 19th which was when I could move to my new flat (where my husband and I currently live), hoping and praying that there won't suddenly be some kind of lockdown that would prevent me from moving.  March 19th evening came and in the evening I moved to the new flat, but we were restricted from visiting other flats/meeting friends but I felt so much better in the new neighbourhood I moved into because I had a lot of friends who live nearby. Even though I couldn't see anyone, I just felt less isolated that in my previous flat. I was very surprised with this feeling; I was always happy and content being alone, but I think those three days felt very different because it also meant I couldn't see my fiance! The 20th was Nawruz, and I spent the 21st cleaning and organizing the new flat which kept me happy and busy, and on the 22nd I resumed working feeling a lot more comfortable and at ease. Later that morning, we got a call that changed everything - our wedding, which wasn't schedule until two weeks later, got moved to...that evening! Nuri moved his things in that afternoon, we got married in the evening and it's been bliss ever since. We didn't take a break after our wedding - we continued working the next day and for nearly two months we've just been at home, in the lockdown together.

Around two weeks ago the government started easing the restrictions, and Nuri had to return to the office. This was a very difficult change for me because since we got married, we've been together every single day and suddenly I had to be alone at home 10hours a day - five times a week without him. I didn't panic or slow down; I wasn't "sad" especially because he's just a few meters away and he would visit/continues to visit during his lunch breaks, but I had to reorganize my daily routines. A few activities came naturally to me, and I thought I'd share the few things I did to cope:

1. Around the same time that Nuri resumed working in the office, the weather started becoming hotter. During the lockdown we went from spring to summer. So little by little, I started re-organizing the flat. I went through my closet and folded away all my jackets and sweaters and kept away the boots; I packed our duvets and replaced them with thin blankets. I used to light candles on the tables, but since we're using the ceiling fans now, we can't light candles so I've placed them here and there as decorations. I went through our kitchen and looked for things that would be affected by the heat and either stored them in cooler cabinets or in the fridge. All this took a few days. I've always enjoyed cleaning and organizing the home/work space (I find it therapeutic). Our flat is completely exposed to sun/open space on one side, so it can easily get hot - and while cleaning I made sure things were organized in such a way that air can pass through and that there were no stuffy corners. There wasn't so much to change since we're still relatively new in this flat, but for those who have lived in the same place for a long time, this quiet/down-time is a great chance to deep-clean!

2. I took some time to think about all the things I've wanted to do for a long time but never got around to. This included simple things like:

• Cleaning out my phone and laptop (we all have photos/documents that we don't need, will never really need and are just taking up space!)
• Reading - I started reading a book at the beginning of March and stopped after I moved, and I recently picked up from where I left
• Blogging!
• Cut my hair! My plan for a long time was to cut my hair after my wedding. Since hair dressers were closed, I chopped off nearly 30cm of my hair by myself!
• Learning how to bake. For the longest time, the only thing I knew how to bake was a cheese cake. More than a year ago, I bought a hand blender to encourage myself to learn how to make new recipes...but I never did this! Every time I had to make a dessert, I'd opt for my easy no-bake ice cream cake. During this lockdown, I learnt how to make two new cakes!

3. Actually work. There are times when my work load is low - and that's when I'd used the time to do some personal things around home. But I noticed that on days when my work load is high, time would go by very fast and I'd feel very satisfied at the end of the day especially when I accomplish the tasks. There were/are times when I don't have personal things to do around home, so I started giving myself more actual work. I looked back at my work diary, and found a lot of items on my to-do list that have been unticked for many months. I found tasks that I once marked as on-going/not urgent and we know what happens - they sometimes become forgotten! So I brought a lot of those tasks to the forefront of my to-do list and starting getting back to them. A lot of these tasks require detailed research and reading, and I've really enjoyed this because it's helping me catch up with work and learn, and stay connected to my work. 

4. As I mentioned earlier, during the first three days of the lockdown, I read global news religiously and I was deeply affected, but after I got married I've just been in another world - HAPPY! I would still read the news every now and then but mainly just the headlines and not the specifics. While the news was mostly negative, a lot of inspiring and exciting news came in from the Baha'i communities around the world. The creative ways Baha'is and friends have taken to cope with these circumstances - zoom classes, devotional meetings, service projects to neighbours, informative radio programmes, even here in our community the friends have very swiftly come up with creative means to stay connected and keep each other uplifted... This is the news/social media I've been tuning into over the last few weeks. I've basically chosen to tune in and read just positive things. This was a conscious effort. The Nawruz and Ridvan messages from the Universal House of Justice this year remind us humanity's inherent oneness, and calls us to remain firm, steadfast and prayerful as we rise above this. Reading/watching/listening to the global efforts of people seizing the opportunities presented by this crisi has kept me positive and hopeful. 

5. Not knowing when things will get back to normal, and seeing how time is just passing by made me decide to write down some goals. Even though I don't exactly have a lot of free time on my hands right now, there are of course perks to working at home - you have a little more control over how you organize your time. So I thought of writing myself a list of some things I would seriously like to get done (eg. study/read this, learn that, create this, continue this, etc.), and this list has a time-frame. I don't often make myself lists like this - I habitually make daily and weekly lists (mostly work-related), so this might take a little while to get used to but so far, just knowing I have this list have given me a little more focus. I have three goals on my list - two are ongoing, but one is time-sensitive, and just seeing this list on my table everyday is helping me fill in blank moments and not lose track of time.