I could never really decide if I can call myself a city girl or not. Port Harcourt, Abuja, Sheffield, Lucknow and Kerman are all pretty big cities, with noisy and quiet days... but I've never lived anywhere quite like Manila -- the definition of a concrete jungle. I've been here for over a year now, and one of the few reasons this place has been bearable is how easy it is to get out. One of the escapes we often make to is my Mom's home town - Mindoro. I spent a few days there earlier this month, and it was absolutely refreshing!
1. Rise and Shine!
In Manila, I depend on my phone to gently wake me up (I usually have three alarms on, five minutes apart). Sometimes, if there's nothing important to do in the morning, no alarm needed; I wake up whenever my body wants to. But in the province?! There's no way to block out the cock-a-doodle-doos as early as 6:30 every day! And it's not just once; these roosters will continue making noise... basically until you're awake and busy and have enough to do to ignore them.
One afternoon, while I was resting in the balcony, I found my grandfather giving his roosters a bath! This was quite a sight to behold. Even my mother said she had never seen chickens getting a bath. Then I asked my mom what does my grandfather do with these roosters; are they for food? I learnt that my he takes care of these roosters until they're a certain size, then he sells them to those who engage in cockfights! I do not support this blood sport at all, but they're very popular here in the Philippines.
2. Superstitions
The only times in my life I've ever heard superstitious stories have always been here in Mindoro. They say whenever you're passing through grasses/ a garden, you have to say "tabi, tabi po" which translates to "excuse me..." because they believe there are spirits or little dwarves around, and if you step of them they can hurt you. At home, if you accidentally drop your spoon on the ground, then you'll be having a female guest; if it's a fork then a male guest. I've always thought these things were silly, and I never for once gave into these beliefs or practises, but during this trip, I witnessed sometime that shook me. It's called "usog". I can't find an English translation, so I'll just tell you the story:
One day, my mom and I picked up one of my second cousins. Outside their house, we saw my cousin's little sister playing. My mom was really admiring the little girl, she touched her hair and kept saying that she looks just like her mom (my mom's cousin) when she was younger. Even after we drove off, my mom continued to comment on how amusing it is that her cousin's daughter looks so much like her. A few hours later, when we dropped off my cousin at her home, we decided to go in to greet the family. When we got there, the little girl was in bed, crying really loud. Her mom said that they don't know what happened, suddenly this evening she started to complain of stomach ache and she's been in pain. My mom touched the little girl's face to check if there's a fever, but the little girl was very cold. Then suddenly my mom said she thinks she gave her "usog". I didn't understand what that word meant but everyone else seemed to understand. My mom put a little saliva on her finger, than rubbed the belly of the little girl... and in a few seconds, she stopped crying! And a few minutes later, the little girl had gone to sleep! Everyone else around was familiar with this; no one seemed shocked, of course... except me! I had to ask what just happened!? My mom explained that it's pretty much like an "evil eye".
Over the years too, I've always heard stories of witch doctors and faith healers in the rural areas. I've listened in on my mom and her friends' conversations, sharing real-life experiences of being "na bati". I never hear these stories in Manila; I always tell myself that I've never been affected by these things my whole life so why believe now? Well, the last incident I witnessed involved my mom (a lady healed a body pain my mom has been suffering with for a year now, and even mentioned the exact place where a "bad spirit" inflicted her). It was a little bit of a struggle for me, trying to accept that these things are possible, even when I literally saw the transformation. When I got back, I spent a few days focused on saying prayers for protection, until I finally got these stories out of my mind.
3. Neighbor drama
I can't remember the last time I knew my neighbor. Or if I ever knew any of the neighbors I've ever had!? Here in Manila, there are more than 20 units on our floor alone, but I can only count five faces I've seen seen (usually when waiting for the elevator). We live in the business district, so majority of the people who live in our building are just here for work.
The province is a completely different story. Everyone in the neighborhood knows everyone; not just by name but personally, generation after generation. On TV here, almost all the commercials for laundry detergent show women sitting together washing their clothes, and that's usually the space where they gossip. I never understood these commercials (because we've always had a washing machine lol), until I saw the exact TV setting in the province. It's very common for the neighbors to get together during merienda time (late afternoon) and just talk about other neighbors. There was one time when one of our neighbours (in Mindoro) saw us in the backyard, so she came in and started telling us that she had just visited this other neighbour (a couple), because last night she heard that couple fighting and fighting. She went into details of the couple's fight, the alcohol etc. and we just stood there puzzled; why is this any of our business?! It's not just among women, but even among men. We went to Mindoro for a specific reason, it had to do with the transport vans ban incident (
read more here) which has affected all the van drivers (including my grandfather). Everyday my grandfather would report to us certain news about the LTO, the LTFRB, etc. and my Mom would make a few calls and visits in town to follow up, only to find out they were false. It's such a small community, so word travels fast, and one's opinion or what one "thought he heard" quickly translates into news.
Tsismis, or idle talk, is very rampant in the rural villages, but of course they happen in the cities too... more common among those who have a lot of free time. I'm not just talking about two or three people gossiping, it happens here in groups. Unfortunately a lot of people here settle for saying that tsismis is part of the Filipino culture and are no long conscious when engaging in this destructive past time.
4. City cat is culture shocked!
I brought my cat with me - remember Ninja from my second week of the Fast? She's no longer a little kitten; she's a big girl now! She was born in the city, and spent a couple of weeks here with us in this condominium before we brought her to the province. During her first few days she was just inside the house - but gradually we started bringing her to the balcony, to the garden... at first she was scared of everything! My grandma's cute little puppies, the neighbor's big cat, the sound of the roosters, even a flower that would wave in the wind (haha). But it didn't take long before she would run out by herself when we open the door to the garden. She started exploring the compound, she started biting the grasses, she even started jumping in front of the roosters, frightening them! I gave her a bath twice, and brought her under the sun to dry up - she enjoyed this, because she doesn't get any sun at home in Manila. My grandmother, uncle and cousins were very impressed with how disciplined she was. They said they've never encountered a cat who would run to you when you call her name or say "come here", they've never seen a cat who only pees or poops in her litter box (this was strange for them because there are no litter boxes in the province; the whole compound is full of sand!). I felt like a proud mother, because everyone was admiring my little Ninja, and she was adapting well to her environment. This made me think of humans too... if you raise your kids in the cities, it's important to bring them back home/ to the country sides once in a while. This is something I'm thankful for, not just for my parents bringing us to the Philippines once a while, growing up, but even in Nigeria we would visit the villages very often - where we'd learn to play street games, go to wet markets and see where our food comes from... all these things to appreciate the simple life, and not take the privileges in the urban life for granted.
5. Fresh air
It's not just Ninja who got to enjoy nature; I did too! My grandparents' compound is surrounded with trees; every day my Mom would pluck mangoes and guavas. It was really fun watching her go loco, and eat them fresh everyday. I brought my brother's bicycle with me, so I had my fair share of exercise everyday. Even though San Jose is pretty busy (there is tricycle pollution and a lot of construction/rennovations going on), but the air is definitely more easy to breathe in than Manila's. My favorite biking day was when I biked in the rain. I was already on my way home then it started to drizzle, so I started to bike fast, but I couldn't escape the rain. It quickly started pouring down. My legs started to ache because of how fast I was going...and I really needed to be fast because I could not longer see well (rain was all over my eye glasses) but then I slowed down at some point, because I was enjoying this! When have I ever biked in the rain? When was the last time I even played under the rain? I felt really happy feeling the rain drops on my skin and breathing in the air that smelt like soil and mango trees. I felt really good and alive! I wouldn't have been this alive in Manila, because we all know that biking in this city is suicide.
6. Stranded on an island?!
My last weekend in Mindoro was my favorite! A relative's relative owns some land on an island, and invited us to go check it out. We drove to Bulalacao, parked at Pocanil, then took a boat to Buyayao island. The boat had to cross the open seas and boy was it crazy because the waves were so strong! We had to put our bags under our seats because the waves were splashing us; we all got drenched in salt water. Some people on the boat were screaming, some were completely quiet (because they were praying), and I was just struggling to see because my glasses were covered with water. The crazy 30- minute ride was worth it though, because our destination was gorgeous. Our side of the island was covered with mangroves, and a little cove with shallow waters which were crystal blue!
We spent a night there. There were two bamboo huts, and the caretakers had a little kitchen we used to cook. When I got there, I dropped my bags, rubbed on some sun screen and dived right into the water, while the others prepared lunch. Night came, and there was no electricity at all on the island! We made a bonfire for some light while we had dinner, then when the fire went out, we were at the mercy of the stars and the moon. It was magical. It was my first time sleeping in a hut (the floor was hard, there were not windows so just open air). To be honest, this experience helped me overcome my fear of the dark. Fortunately no bugs or wild animals came anywhere near us that night.
The next morning, we went for a treck around the island. It has a rich history, and by rich, we're talking about Yamashita's gold/treasures! There was another public breach on the other side, facing the open seas. We almost had to wait until evening before the boat picked us up (they said the waves were too strong), but we insisted, so they came after lunch (by lunch time we didn't have any more meat left, so our guide made a dish which I normally wouldn't have tried if there were other dishes available, but I had no option... so I tried it and I loved it! It was jackfruit cooked in coconut milk!)
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Cooking rice on top of wood
and in the distance you can see the gatorade blue water! |
More than anything, I learnt about the caretakers... they're the indigenous people of Mindoro (mostly mountain dwellers) called the Mangyans. A lot of Mangyans have modernized, you see them in the cities in clothes but you can often tell them apart from how they look (they are darker, shorter, have wide faces and feet and curly hair), but up in the mountains they have very minimal clothing on (usually just a cover around their private parts). The caretaker has eight kids, and she said one of her sons is in jail because a few years ago, someone broke the window of the church. The kids started to put the blame on him, even though it wasn't his fault at all; he had nothing to do with the incident. But Mangyans are really quiet and simple people, so it was easy for them to just put the blame on him. One particular guy teased him and kept telling everyone it was his fault and he got very very angry and he stabbed the guy. So this Mangyan boy was put in jail for killing someone. This is just a small story; Mangyans around the island face discrimination all the time because of their innocence, their primitiveness, and simple-mindedness. But little by little they are being empowered and educated.
During the several hours I sat in the water, soaking in the sun, admiring the view (the photo below was my view on both mornings - look at the mountains covered in trees; it's almost like a 3D wall paper), I reflected so much on how BIG this world is, and how tiny we all are. Around this island, we saw corals under the water. We are tiny in respect to the world, but our actions collectively, over the years are so powerful... powerful enough to bleach a third of the Great Barrief reef! I am very supportive of the Government's plan to shut down Boracay Island starting tomorrow, giving the island time for "natural healing". Sorry for the businesses that will be affected, but as Shoghi Effendi said,
"We cannot segregate the human heart from the environment outside us and say that once one of these is reformed everything will be improved. Man is organic with the world. His inner life moulds the environment and is itself deeply affected by it. The one acts upon the other and every abiding change in the life of man is the result of these mutual reactions."
Bahá'u'lláh once referred to the country as the world of the soul, and the city as the world of bodies. Stepping out of Manila, even when I sometimes do this for just a day, or half a day, always makes me feel recharged and inspired. Sometimes when I come across the "old ways of life" in the provinces, I am reminded of how the world is still growing; change is happening, at different paces in different places. Earth Day (sorry, I'm two days late!) is one of the several reminders that we need to decide, through our actions, what kind of change we want to contribute to.
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Throwback to my 2017 Earth Day posts:
